I just saw a guy touching my car door at midnight.
Did you chase him and/or shoot him, sir?
No, I yelled at him.
Good. What did he look like, sir?
It was in the shadows at midnight, so he was dark. If it would have been noon he might have been light.
What direction was he going?
He was going down the street. Can you catch him and arrest him?
Ok, thanks. Goodbye.