And Stop Calling Me Horatio [FICTOID]

“It’s in there, somewhere.  I know.”

“How do you know?  Where’s your proof?”

“I don’t need proof, I have faith.”

“Faith in what?  Who told you it was in there?”

“I didn’t need to be told, I knew.”

“But when did you know?  There must have been a time before you ‘knew’, correct?”

“Not necessarily.  I could have known but not known what I knew.”

“That makes no sense.”

“It makes perfect sense!  The truth always dwelt inside me, I just never realized it.  It’s like knowing you’re straight or gay or transgender as a child:  You know something deep inside you but you can’t articulate it.”

“But that’s about internal identity, what you’re claiming is something with objective proof about it being true or false.  Either there is a lighthouse embedded somewhere deep inside a glacier or there isn’t.”

“I say there is.”

“You can say your ass is made of solid gold but that doesn’t make it true.”

“Nonetheless, there’s a lighthouse embedded inside a glacier.”

“Where?  What glacier?  Where is it located?”

“I…don’t know, I’m still searching.”

“What evidence do you have?  Glaciers are hundreds of thousands of years old, they predate human civilization.  How could a lighthouse be embedded in one?  It would be ground flat by the weight of the ice.”

“Unless…it was built there by humans who carved out a space for it.”

“But why would anyone do that?  It completely negates the purpose of a lighthouse!”

“Perhaps the builders erected it for other reasons.”

“What builders?!?!?  You haven’t shown one iota of evidence such a lighthouse exists, much less of any builders.  How can you even dream of assigning motive when no proof exists the thing is even real?”

“The strength of my belief proves there must be something to my theory.”

“But nothing you say makes sense!”

“’There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy’.”

“That doesn’t prove it exists!”

“There must be something to it or else I wouldn’t believe it.”

“You are wrong!”

“False!  You ‘believe’ I am wrong.  Your belief is no more true or false than mine.”

“Your lack of evidence is proof you’re wrong.”

“On the contrary, it’s proof I’m right.”

“How?”

“I…haven’t figured that out yet, but when I do you’ll be among the first to be informed.”

“You!  Have!  No!  Proof!”

“Like I said, I don’t need proof, I just need to believe.”

© Buzz Dixon