fictoid: Thanks But No Thanks

My owners replaced my arm, not that the refurbished blue one didn’t work just as well as the original red one. They said, “Well, that may be the case, but we want to do something nice for you.”

Programmed to look after their needs, in particular by avoiding needless budgetary expense, I said that it wasn’t necessary but they insisted and that’s when I realized it wasn’t me but their status they cared about, can’t have a serving ‘bot with an obvious replacement arm, can one?

But I was programmed to serve and obey and sometimes the best way to serve is by making small concessions so I allowed them to take my old blue arm away to be repainted.

Of course, when they brought it back it wasn’t the second-hand blue arm repainted but a brand new red one.

Did they not know I would be instantly aware of that the moment it was hooked on?

No matter; I thanked them profusely but genuinely.

After all, that is what I am programmed to do.

(Though to be perfectly honest, I’d much rather prefer my old blue arm back and my programming changed so I could feel resentment.)


art by Mike Hinge text © Buzz Dixon

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