Fictoid: There’s An App For That

Rene Gruau - theres an app for that It’s very simple, Senator.

We need you to support a bill to provide a nationwide anti-bullying app for all school kids.

If they’re bullied, all they have to do is enter the name of the person bullying them.

Of course, the reports are anonymous…

At first.

The idea is to link specific abusers with specific victims.

Oh, we’ll make a show of bringing the young miscreants in, give them a good scolding, a sound talking to, that sort of thing.

But in reality we’re going to track them, guide them, steer them to careers in law enforcement, tax collecting, social services, prison guards.

See, we’re also going to track all the victims as well.  And when they’ve grown into tax paying adults, we’re going to keep them in line by bringing their childhood nemesis back into their lives.  Make them more compliant, as it were.

This way the gears of society will keep grinding and the money will keep flowing.

Our citizens will dutifully select their own personal tormentors, and fines and taxes will be levied, and the prisons will stay full, and your offshore account will reflect all this.

What’s that?  Why of course we can find a position for your son.

.

text © Buzz Dixon art by Rene Gruau

Who Can Defeat Killah Priest & The Mighty Wu-Tang Clan?

Elmore Leonard: wot he sez...