An Anthropologist At A Costume Party [FICTOID]

Stalking the wild fashionista is no easy task.  You can’t let them know you’re stalking them because then they will act deliberately, unnaturally to attract your eye.

No, the trick is to catch them in their natural habitat, doing what comes naturally.

A costume party, for instance.

Now, at first this seems like a contradiction in terms:
How can a dress up affair be “natural”?

Yet a little thinking will show it’s the most perfect arrangement for studying the wild fashionista.

While they know they are being observed, they don’t know it’s for scientific purposes and as such they dress up is a manner more blatantly obvious to their true nature than when trying to pass on city streets.

Case in point:
The specimen I documented just last week, a fine artist dressed as a frog, her costume an arrangement of green and blue,

I take my responsibility as an anthropologist very seriously and do nothing to inflict harm por cruelty on my subject.

In this case, I waited until she over the flower arrangement on the buffet table to grab some french fries. Then I shot her square in the right gluteus maximus with a tranquilizer dart, tagging her, loading her into my car, and driving her out of town before turning her loose in the woods.

It’s a fine arrangement, and one I’m only too happy to repeat.

© Buzz Dixon