Jack Nicholson Orders A Wedding Cake

I’d like to order a wedding cake with two grooms on the top.

We don’t do wedding cakes for same sex marriages.

What do you mean? 

Only what’s on the menu.  You can have a standard heterosexual wedding cake.  It comes with a bride and a groom.

Yeah, I know what it comes with, but it's not what I want.

Come back when you make up your mind.

Wait a minute.  I have made up my mind.   I'd like a plain wedding cake with flowers on the top.

No substitutions.

You don’t have flower wedding cake toppers?

Not for same sex marriages.

Okay, I'll make it as easy for you as I can.   I'd like to order two heterosexual wedding cakes.  When you deliver them, we’ll remove the bride from the first cake and substitute the groom from the second cake.  Then you bill me for two heterosexual cakes, go deliver the second one, and you haven't broken any rules.

Where do you want me to deliver the second cake?

I want you to deliver it in your ear.

i know the voices arent real

thanx to Bob Rafelson and Carole Eastman (as Adrien Joyce) for writing the original scene this was based on

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