okay kids let’s go

awwww do we hafta?

yes dears after all he is your father
besides this will only take an hour (which we’ll dock from his weekly visitation)
and then we’re off to your aunt’s house
and won’t we have fun there?

so into the car they pile:
…..beautiful mom
…..beautiful children
…..beautiful dog

(a purebred collie,
source of much contention
in the family in days of yore
dad often said
you love that
dog more than
you love me
and mom and
the kids said
duh…)

mom checks rear view mirror
makes sure her little boy clown (store bought costume)
and her little girl princess (homemade mother-daughter project)
are safely strapped in

the collie is bounding around in the backseat

can’t keep her still no matter what

no matter

pull out into traffic
head to dad’s place

do we hafta go trick or treating with dad?

yes dears he is your father (biologically speaking)
be polite (that will help us with the judge)
but don’t eat any of the candy (your dad lives in a sketchy neighbor

but that’s his choice
his responsibility)

we’ll throw it away before we go to your aunt’s party (who knows what kind of

off brand trash
his neighbors
will be offering)

there will be much better candy at your aunt’s house (much better)
but don’t tell him
don’t hurt his feelings (that’s my job)

it’s warm for late October

and the collie whines and presses her nose against the window

so the clown in the back seat lowers it
and the collie sticks her head out
and grooves on the rush of air through her fur and over her tongue

and the princess complains that the breeze from the window is messing her hair

and mom glances in the rearview mirror to tell the clown to raise the window

and the car…d_r_i_f_t_s…e_v_e_r…so…s_l_i_g_h_t_l_y across the dividing line

huge tractor-trailer rig barrels
down the road on the other side

misses their car by a quarter of an inch

but it doesn’t miss the collie

WHUMP!  =snikt!=

and the dog
is decapitated
as neatly as if
Doctor Sergei S. Bryukhonenko
had been in charge of the project

headless canine body flops back in the rear seat, heart still pumping blood

children scream in horror as it sprays out
…..soaking them
…..soaking their costumes
…..soaking the rear seat

mom screams in horror
red spray coats her windshield
zigzags across several lanes (thank God other drivers see her/swerve/avoid tragedy)
regains control
children continue screaming
decapitated dog twitches and kicks and claws and scratches

urine and feces spew out
mix with blood
add to holiday festivities

in shock, mom wonders what to do

purse is covered in blood
can’t reach for her phone

but they’re only a few blocks from dad’s apartment!

hits the accelerator
runs a red light
narrowly avoids another accident

screeches to a halt in front of the building (thank God he lives on the ground floor with a door facing the street)

mom flings open the rear door
screams for her kids to get out

they scramble out
crying and sobbing
shock taking over

stay here!  don’t move!

mom runs to dad’s door
pounds on it
leaves bloody fist prints

kids stand by the open car door
look at the now still corpse
they cry
they sob
they can’t do anything
they’ve got to do something

so without a word they gently reach in
pull the body out
cradle it in their arms
walk up to dad’s door

dad opens the door
holding his third beer
of the afternoon
(fifth for the whole day)

his kids stand in front of him
faces stark with horror
eyes brimming with sorrow

…..blood-soaked clown
…..blood soaked princess
…..blood-soaked canine corpse w/no head

and he smiles

“Hey, kids, great costumes!”

story © Buzz Dixon

 

buzz@buzzdixon.com