Fictoid: a little late for that question…

by Buzz on 19/03/2015

Alex Sharpe Ross - are you really a tattoo artist

“Are you really a tattoo artist?”

“Sure, I am.  Look at the great job
I did on my cat over there…”

underlying art by Alex Sharp Ross

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If The Answer Isn’t “Yes”, Then It’s “No”

by Buzz on 18/03/2015

I’m sitting on the sidelines watching two people who share a long time friendship strain that relationship to the breaking point.  Details changed to protect the guilty.

One we’ll call Sam asked the other (whom we’ll call Pat) if they wanted to get involved in a deal a while back.

Pat didn’t, but Pat also didn’t want to hurt Sam’s feelings so instead of saying no said, “Let me think about it after the holidays.”

Sam chose to interpret that as “Yes!” and planned accordingly.

You see where this is going…

animated bridge collapse

Sam called Pat and asked about closing the deal.  Pat hemmed and hawed then finally said they weren’t interested.

Sam grew irritated.  Said some harsh things.  Accused Pat of double crossing them.

If the answer isn’t yes, then it’s no.”

And it isn’t a yes unless there’s a piece of paper with at least two signatures and a date on it and/or a check that has cleared the bank.

I say this for everyone but especially for those folks trying to break into show biz / publishing / video games.

“Maybe” / “we’ll see” / “we’re looking into it” / “perhaps” / “it’s under consideration” / “they love it” / “it’s a done deal” / “as soon as the last element falls in place” all mean no

They’re nice “no“s
Polite “no“s
Soft “no“s
But they’re still “no

If they haven’t said yes and whipped out a check book to prove it, they mean no.

Don’t delude yourself
Don’t lie to yourself
Don’t get your feelings hurt

Roll with it and move on.


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Roy Doty (1922 – 2015)

by Buzz on 18/03/2015

Roy Doty 628x524px-7428780d_ScreenShot2012-05-12at15.00.41

I’ve posted before on Roy Doty, and so it saddens me to report his death via Tom Spurgeon’s The Comics Reporter.

I have nothing to add to the enthusiasm I’ve shown for his work in the past.  He was a marvelous cartoonist, accomplishing more with simple clean lines that most artists can do with all the fancy filigrees they can throw on the page.  He said of himself “What could be nicer? I sit and draw funny pictures and people send me money.

There’s a term “the jazz musicians’ musician” meaning an artist of exceptional talent and ability who is just so good at what they do that the uninitiated don’t recognize or fully appreciate it, but those who are trying to make their own mark in the field realize what genius they possess.

Roy Doty was a cartoonists’ cartoonist.


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Fictoid: Cinderella::Aftermath

by Buzz on 17/03/2015


What are you doing here?



I can see that,
my question is why?

I have no answer.

You are a princess now.

I know.

Servants can do this.

God, I know!  I know! 
Why do you think I’m here?

Don’t they clean well enough?

They clean most excellently,
giving me very little to do. 
No complaint there.

Then why — ?

I can’t stand the way they look at me.

Ah, jealousy –

No!  Not jealousy.

Contempt?  Show me the ones who –

No!  No contempt…just…they look at me,
and I know they are thinking,
“Why you?  Why you and not me?”

So they are jealous.

No.  Never jealous.  Curious.  Puzzled. 
I’m puzzled, too.  Why me?  Why…me? 
Two questions, when you actually come
to think about it.

I love you.

You are very kind to me,
but do you love me,
or do you love the idea of me? 
You knew nothing about me,
not even the fact I existed,
until that night.

I know you now.

But what do you know of me? 
You know of my cruel stepmother
and stepsisters, but thousands of
other children suffer as I did. 
Why didn’t you go save them?

If you want me to establish a charity –

No.  I mean…yes…please…a charity. 
Anything to pay back a fraction of what we owe.

“Owe”?!?!?  We owe nothing!

Really?  All this opulence,
all this pleasure, all this power
comes from someone, someone
who can ill afford it.

We are their leaders,
their protectors.

Protectors from whom? 
Others who want to collect their taxes? 
We protect them for ourselves.

Do you want to return to their level?

You have been kind…to me…and
 generous…to me.
I would be ungracious
 to not reciprocate.

Then what do you want?

I want to feel innocent again. 
I want to feel guiltless. 
I want to feel good.

And this cleaning,
it will help you?


You missed a spot.


text © Buzz Dixon
art by Edmund Dulac



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Fictoid: she wasn’t a very convincing liar

by Buzz on 15/03/2015

mead schaeffer geeze not again1

underlying art by Mead Schaeffer

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The Words Of The Prophets…

by Buzz on 15/03/2015

…are written on the subway walls
and tenement halls

WotP War-is-a-Racket-General-Smedley-Butler-528-x-366

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The Parable Of The Statue

by Buzz on 14/03/2015


There is an exhibit called The Most Beautiful Statue In The World.

The people running the exhibit tell us how wonderful, how marvelous, how sublime the statue is, truly “a work of art, a thing of beauty, a joy forever”.

But when people enter the exhibit, all they see is a lump of misshapen mud, a dull drab ugly color, with lumpy uneven texture.

Some people leave immediately,
either in anger or bemusement, thinking:
“It’s a hoax, a fake, a fraud, some joker
trying to put one over on us.”

Others stay, and pretend
they see the beauty
the exhibitors claim is there.

Like courtiers in The Emperor’s New Clothes, they believe the hype more than the evidence of their own eyes, and rather than be shamed and ridiculed for not seeing the beauty everyone else claims to see, they pretend to see it, too.

Some actually do believe the misshapen mud is beautiful, because if they were creating a statue, that would be the best they could do, the best they could imagine.

But a few look at it more closely,
and see something much better,
far better under the mud.

And as they look closer, they see the mud
is just a crust over something far more perfect.

Looking closer still, they realize the statue
is covered by a crust of mud dauber wasp nests.

So they start cleaning the statue,
and when they do voices rise in alarm.

“What are you trying to do?”

“You’re ruining the statue!”

“Stop!  Stop at once!”

And the wasps fly out,
angry and attacking those
who dare clean the statue.

But bit by bit they clean up
a patch here and a patch there,
revealing more and more of
the beautiful, genuine, pristine
statue underneath.

And while the wasps may rave and the exhibitors bluster and the crowd tries to stop them, in the end those forces won’t succeed, but the true statue underneath the mud nests will be open for all to see just how beautiful it is.


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Fictoid: one day at the head of the class

by Buzz on 13/03/2015

norman rockwell - SHUT UP cap

art by Norman Rockwell
text © by Buzz Dixon

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by Buzz on 12/03/2015

“Bizzle’s rap contains all the usual anti-gay bugaboos: gays are uncontrollably lusty; they’re like pedophiles; they violate God’s rules and summon his wrath; they trounce my religious freedom to persecute them; and now they’re becoming violent—oh, but by the way, while I hate their sin, I love them and just pray they’ll become straight like me.  Indeed, what’s most marked about today’s homophobia is what a clear expression of narcissism it is, along with how unrigorous its rationalizations are.  Homophobic people seem unable to see past themselves, to transcend their most rudimentary emotions and arrive at a place that’s often reachable only if we apply a modicum of reason—often spurred by empathy—to challenge old mental habits.

“Instead, homophobes assume that the only natural way of being, for everyone, is straight like them.  The late philosopher and psychoanalyst Elisabeth Young-Bruehl once wrote that those with narcissistic prejudice ‘cannot tolerate the idea that there exist people not like them.’  It’s a telling diagnosis, given how freely anti-gay thought characterizes gay people (as opposed to anti-gay people) as narcissistic—presumably an artifact of the Freudian notion that homosexuality stems from a developmental block in the path from self-love to love of others.  Borrowing another concept from psychoanalysis, homophobes may be especially likely to project their own narcissism onto others as a way to deflect taking responsibility for their own issues.” – Nathaniel Frank, The Narcissism of Today’s Homophobia

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Tom Waits On The Evils Of Bad Writing

by Buzz on 11/03/2015

tom waits on writing

“The world is a hellish place,
and bad writing is destroying
the quality of our suffering.”
– Tom Waits

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